Pray for Patrick today...Surgery.


Things are changing. I feel it - down deep. Changing on all fronts, really. Last night at work, I was offered a new full-time position that I really was not looking for or even desirous of... but the opportunity kind of jumped into my lap. It will help quite a bit with bills - making the pursuit for teaching a more feasible leap of faith.

Things are changing with friends and those that I call family and with ministry and with my place in it all. My place in their lives and in the roles that I have come to fill... it is all slowly becoming different and I feel like I am a fish out of water. I am having a hard time breathing and understanding all that happens but I am not sure if I really want to go back to the tank, either.

Maybe I am ready for a bigger pond to swim in. But I really don't like giving up the security of what's familiar and seemingly safe. I can't say it is comfortable because I feel like I have a pin in my back that keeps poking me and pushing me - and the pin becomes larger and more pointed by the day.

God, if this is You directing, then show me where to go and teach me to trust You. If it is me taking over, then take the wheel out of my hands and let it all out of my control, again. But please, don't leave me in the dark without answers or a direction.

I am free. In You. I am free. And this is just another turn in the trail we are blazing together... and I am free to follow You.